I won’t be single for long?

As I’ve said before, I’m obsessed with the minute-long cooking videos on Facebook. While these videos were popularized by the Tasty channel, that was merely a gateway drug to those of us who need a virtual food fix when sitting in class.

Today, I was sitting on my computer being admittedly extremely unproductive when I came across a new video from Food Network for Rachel Ray’s “’You won’t be single for long’ Vodka Cream Pasta.” Aside from the striking first visual of cheesy tomatoey goodness being speared by a fork, I was enticed by the title. And no, not just because it had the word vodka in it.

“You won’t be single for long” may be the weirdest modifier I’ve ever seen on a dish. Don’t worry, I’m not about to break into a song about how magical the single life is and how I don’t need no man or how sad it is that our society prioritizes romantic relationships so much (I could but that would be sad).

Instead I decided to test the validity of the title. After all, I’ve frequently found that things don’t meet their moniker. For example, I’ve never found hot sauce to be particularly “hot.” And of course I don’t think that Vegan Mac and Cheese deserves to use the word cheese given that it has none.

So can this pasta make me a match? If I follow the recipe line by line, will I finally have someone to hold my hand in the grocery store?

Here’s the video in question:


Here’s what my version looks like:


My first complaint after prepping this would be that it’s prettier than me, so I’m not sure how helpful that is.

Second, it wasn’t too difficult to follow. I was kind of hoping for an intricate recipe that would demonstrate my cooking prowess to potential suitors. Any old plain jane could have pulled this one off, especially given the fact that there was an accompanying video.

It was, however, delicious, which I am to assume was the point of the name.

It’s been about 15 hours since I devoured this bowl of pasta. I’m not sure what the timeline is for this past to work its magic but I’m patiently waiting for something to happen. Stay tuned.


You can find the full recipe here.


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